Hey everyone, it’s been ages. I haven’t been here in over 2 years. I was literally overtaken by events. It’s indeed a blessing to be calm enough to share my thoughts after such a long time. Today I decided to share my findings on the road to old age. I hope you enjoy it.
I once read somewhere that an elderly woman told her niece “no matter what you do., don’t grow old; it’s a trick”. How true!!! It’s amazing how when growing we can’t wait till we turn 5, 10 (double digits), 13 (teenagers), 16 (oh sweet sixteen!!!), 21 and lastly 30. After that we find ourselves less willing to talk about our exact age. We’d rather bounce around our 30s without actually mentioning or even remembering if there’s an additional # to 30. “I’m in my thirties, that ALL”. Then don’t even go near the 40s and onwards. You stop counting how old you are and then you start saying “I don believe I am this age, I don’t feel it”.
It was while thinking of growing old that I decided to look further. All of a sudden among my contemporaries, I started seeing changes. One by one I started noticing white beards, wider foreheads (I didn’t say bald heads) and eye glasses on my friends and family: from real life to Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. I had to ask myself….” Wow, you mean these gray hairs and glasses are actually age related?” That was strange cos by glasses, I mean real prescription glasses to help what is called ‘tired eyes’. Then it slowly came creeping up on me too!!!
After consoling myself that I wasn’t growing old so soon, 2 things happened:
i). I woke up one day and knew I just wasn’t seeing like before. After battling with that for several months, I finally respected myself and went to check those eyes and true enough, the eyes were getting tired. The day I picked up my glasses, wore them and stepped out the store, I almost fell down cos the ground became so close and everything so clear it was like I was seeing using magnifying glasses. Chai!!! Evidence of growing old.
ii). I have 2 strands of beard that I’ve always pulled out. For many years I’ve plucked them and they are black. One fateful day, I pulled on one and lo and behold, it had become gray…white. I just shook my head and realized that the gray beards I had noticed among my brothers weren’t showing on me because I had no full beard. Hmmnn… that was additional evidence.
I then told myself “girl you need to LIVE THIS LIFE because before you know it, you’ll be wearing fake teeth and be there wondering where all the years went!. I have picked up life’s lessons from here and there that I have therefore decided to apply to myself. I hope at least one strikes a chord with you. Enjoy and please feel free to add your advice so we can all learn. So here goes:
- Don’t be alone. By this I mean find someone you love or accept someone who loves you and stay with them. Don’t be so tough and difficult to live with that you end up being all by yourself. If things failed in a past relationship, marriage or partnership, find another. Don’t dwell on the past one. According to Teni “we move”. There are over 7 billion humans on planet earth, so please give love a second chance. I found out that many of the 80 something year old’s I met who were alone and had refused to give love a chance were alone, sad, miserable and downright mean…just angry with the world. The kids are all grown , gone to live their own lives and so they were left with no one. The other ones I have met, who had stayed with a partner still quarrel and bicker but always look out for each. They share and cherish their companionship which helps to keep them very stable emotionally. That’s one of the important things you need at that age.
- Now when you are together, create memories for each other. Travel places, visit friends and family, go on holidays and cruises, etc. If one passes on eventually, the other has wonderful memories to cherish which can cheer them up when they get lonely. So I repeat, DO NOT BE ALONE.
- Keep your mind very engaged, active and alert. Keep reading books, playing mind games and doing all kinds of puzzles and mind engaging activities. You do not want to experience what old age can do to one’s brain. Let your mind be busy.
- Stop worrying about how to change the world, just brighten the corner where you are. Some nice old woman said to me “We might not be able to change the whole world but we have changed it by having and raising sweet children and grandchildren”. So block out the bad news on the TV, pray for the world and live cos before you know it, the years would have gone by and you would have spent so many of them in worry with lots of anxiety and sadness.
- Being someone who doesn’t like being in the spotlight on my birthday, I was jostled to hear a little boy tell his grandmother who turned 91 that she “needs to celebrate and really really enjoy her birthday because it takes sooooo……long for another one to come by”. So celebrate yourself and life on your birthdays. Be happy about how far you’ve come and look forward to where the Lord is taking you.
- Love hard on your loved ones. You never know when it will be too late. See how Covid-19 carried us do anyhow!!!. So many people who lost loved ones couldn’t do anything but watch on screens how their family members who passed away were bundled away and buried. So please go ahead and love them, then show them you love them and also tell them you love them. Cos here today, gone tomorrow.
- Take the sabbath issue seriously. A research shows that the Seventh Day Adventists have higher life expectancies with an additional 10 years because they take the sabbath rest. The book, ‘Peak Performance’ mentions that research also shows that there is reduced productivity after every 6 days worked in a week and hence the advise that we rest for at least a day to heal from the past week and rejuvenate for better performance in the coming week. So rest from your phone, apps and every drama that drains you every week. My people, I heard Jews don’t even turn on light switches, punch elevator keys or make calls during sabbaths.
- Take that Jesus thing very seriously. You know what, after all is said and done, that’s what really matters. If you end without Him, you have labored and toiled in vain
- Please ‘MYOB’. This means ‘mind your own business’. So if they don’t tell you, don’t ask. If they don’t invite, don’t go. Dey your dey. Face ya front….and you’ll have peace of mind to last your lifetime.
- Lastly plan for your retirement, old age and end of life care. Don’t stay there thinking your children will automatically take care of you when you grow old. You might be disappointed. So make it easy for all of you by ensuring you’re adequately covered in these areas.
Thank you all for your time. Have a lovely week ahead.
Love always, Ananzo